Have you ever had a friend who promises you to keep all your secrets safe and then in your absence goes around and brags to everyone about each and every one of your conversations? And when you start to get a tiny hint of doubt, they cry, raise a ruckus and throw a whole new drama because you suspected them and make you feel guilty??
Well, then we are on the same page.
I’ve met two such friends in my life and so I can understand the feeling better than anybody. But how did I get fooled twice?! I couldn’t forgive myself when I was deceived by another guy in a row. It hurt so badly.
In friendships, all that we expect is trust. We give and take trust-being the highest above all gems and currencies!! Yes, trust can never be bought, trust is beyond everything and only a good friend is privileged to have it! We don’t take it for granted!
I’ve had some really bitter experiences which I’ve never shared with anyone but that one friend! There used to be so many gossips and rumours about me for no reason and I hardly cared because I believed I had some really good friends that I can rely on. I don’t know about other places, but here, you can’t cross teenage without a bunch of gossips about you (mostly false rumors with extra toppings and spices added by the expert gossip mongers) I told him about my other friends, my family stuff, my secret crushes, my fears, and everything!
Whenever we met, he used to back me up, support me and most of the times, in front of everyone else.. when I was bullied, he was never around! He would vanish during crisis and come up with an excuse later!
And guess what he did?
He went all around the school, twisting each and every word that I had told him into something else. He made himself look like a hero by sharing all my secrets and deepest feelings! Nobody cared to stop him? Yeah, because people love to hear others’ secrets and cook up more stories! How mean!
And I, above all, trusted him for a whole year, only to be humiliated and left hurt with a huge scar in my heart for a lifetime. It has been years since this happened. But I do remember everything in detail. I got to know everything only after we all dispersed to various cities and states for college. How stupid! Right after all this, I got fooled once again in college. I must tell you, that guy is the smartest, meanest and the most worthless being alive! But thank goodness, I hadn’t told him many many things, now that I recall..I’m glad.
The so-called best friends are harmful. They are toxic. You don’t have to keep them close. A drop or a bottle, poison is poisonous.
Being an optimist, I learnt my lesson from these bad guys. I learnt how to identify good friend from the rest. I made some really awesome friends too! 🙂
Here’s a list of things I learnt about “friends”, “good friends” and “so-called best friends”.
- One who joins you and trusts you even before knowing about your popularity and talents, stays with you forever. (Yeah, that’s how I have friends over a decade, yeah, I know am bragging 😀 )
- When you have your doubts about your friend’s loyalty and honesty, a true friend would talk it out. Not create huge drama out of it.
- A good friend would never ask you for details, they will just know everything when they look into your eyes. Not knowing wouldn’t be a problem, they will just support you no matter what!
- A real best friend would stay right next to you when you are in trouble. Not just vanish during times of crisis.
- Good friends try to protect your innocence, fake ones take advantage of it.
- You could always see trust and honesty in your friend’s eyes. If you don’t, don’t hesitate to confront them. Even after that, if you are not sure, just cut them off. Your intuition, your heart would say it all.
You can even trust your enemies. But never these so-called best friends.
If you have such a friend, don’t forget to do the needful. If you had one, learn from the mistake and move on. 🙂
~ Yuvathi ❤ 🙂